Two month review

Kudos to the women that write monthly blogs.  It is 11:22 am and I am still in my bathrobe, don’t remember the last time I brushed my hair (just kidding…I never brush my hair), and am anxiously watching the baby monitor out of my peripheral.  Regardless, I decided it was time to sum up the past eight-ish weeks and list out what I have learned.

  • Babies pee a ton.  Little boys can pee across a room.  That is not an exaggeration.  And no wall, piece of furniture, or dog is safe.
  • They tell you that traveling with a newborn is the easiest time to travel with your child.  Granted, he basically sleeps the entire time.  We occasionally pull over to change and feed him but, otherwise, he hangs out in his car seat happy as a clam.  What people don’t tell you is that you will need to be a freaking Tetris master to cram all of the crap into your car while still having room for the actual child.
  • You will find yourself talking about bodily functions – both yours and your child’s – more than you think.
  • Jefferson has the sweetest most amazing little rolls.  Rolls on his thighs, on his arms, and an old man roll on the back of his neck.  I love to nuzzle those little rolls!!  While being adorable, they also capture milk, lint, and dog hair.  I have to check those rolls daily to see what treasures they are hiding.

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  • I am not breastfeeding, and I think that decision has really benefited my personality and my family.  I need alone time to recharge.  That is not new for me.  Staying at home with a person that genuinely needs me non-stop can be challenging for me.  Having the ability to step away to go to the gym or grab lunch with a friend has been such a blessing for me.  I did not make that decision lightly.  And I notice people’s reactions when I tell them I am not nursing.  But I think things happened as they did for a purpose.  And maybe the universe knew I would need to be able to step away in order to be the best mom possible.
  • You will feel tired.  Everyone tells you that.  I knew I would be tired from not getting continuous sleep at night.  I didn’t realize that part of my physical recovery would be exhaustion.  I could feel fine one minute and then absolutely wiped out the next.
  • Before Jefferson was born, Bradley and I talked about how we wanted to prioritize time for our relationship in a way that is separate from being parents.  I think we have done a good job with that!  We have gone out for beers, nice dinners, a wedding, and even had an overnight trip.  It is nice to be able to devote undivided attention to one another…to just be husband and wife for a bit.  I sometimes struggle with being a mom and a wife at the same time.  And there are days that he gets home, and I have spent all of my energy being a mom.  I don’t know how to be a wife to him in those moments.  So, the time away is necessary for us right now.

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  • I worried about the dogs licking Jefferson for the first month of his life.  Long story short, I have other things to worry about.  A little spit never killed anyone.
  • Children’s books could melt even the coldest heart.  I can barely make it through them without sobbing.  Really great for promoting reading to my son.
  • I have said this once before, but I love seeing our families change from parents and siblings to grandparents, aunts, and uncles.  Their love for Jefferson is so special, and I know that he will have a beautiful life with all of their love and support for him.  The only challenge will be making sure he is not spoiled rotten.
  • Baby fingernails grow extremely fast.  And are terrifying to clip.  So keep those little hand mittens handy for when you need to protect their face from their claws but you just don’t have the emotional strength to clip their nails for the 2,394,872,374th time this week.

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  • When they smile, it makes you feel absolutely amazing.  When those smiles are in reaction to you and not gas, you feel even better than amazing.
  • People love to ask you when you will have another.  Ugh.
  • There are times when being a mother is absolutely mind numbing.  I feed him, I change him, and then we settle down for a nap.  Repeat.  For someone who is used to having to think critically for her job, this can be torture for me at times.  “Do things when he naps!”  Like laundry and washing bottles?  Yeah, that gets pretty boring, too.
  • You will love having visitors.  Having visitors that do a load of laundry or watch the baby while you nap are your absolute favorite.  Visitors that expect to be entertained are not your favorite.
  • Dear Amazon – FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP RINGING THE DOORBELL.
  • You understand why your mom friends are always late or suddenly have to cancel.  It is not that we don’t want to see you.  It’s that leaving the house is effort.  You don’t want me to bring a screaming baby to the coffee shop.  I promise.  And I am trying to be on time but he pooped five minutes into the car ride, I had to pull over and change him in the backseat, and then he spit up everywhere.  We are trying but we need a splash of grace.  I promise to never say “He is sick” if he isn’t.  I’ll tell you the truth.  I am tired.  I don’t have the emotional energy to pretend I care about you right now.  He is having a bad day, and I don’t want to feel judged or shamed by strangers.  Doesn’t mean I don’t love you.  Just means I can’t do it today.

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  • Men love to write books about parenthood, how to calm your child, labor and delivery, etc.  Let that sink in.
  • No one told me that my child may sleep beautifully at night and be a total terror during the day.  Nap time is a struggle around here.  Please don’t make a recommendation.  I promise I have tried everything.  Probably a few things that are not 100% sanctioned by the American Pediatric Association.  He just doesn’t like to nap right now, and my patience is learning how to cope.
  • Other parents love to one up you.  “You think your kid spits up?!”  “Just wait until they can crawl and get into everything.”  “My kid once screamed for 12 hours straight.”  I still don’t understand the concept of making misery a competition.
  • Older adults love to tell you to soak it in.  You’ll miss these moments.  Will I miss sweet snuggles on my chest?  Absolutely.  Will I miss him screaming and clawing at my neck while being 3 inches from my face?  Nope.
  • Everything is a new experience now.  We put a kiddie pool on our front porch and watching his skeptical face while we dip his toes in the water is the best feeling.  Watching his eyes dart across the colorful pages of a book makes reading feel magical.  Rubbing his hands across Reece’s back and seeing his eyes get wide reminds me of how wonderful pets are.  I feel like I see a new side of Bradley every time he gets Jefferson to grin at him.  It is such an exciting time.
  • Nothing will make you curse quicker than watching them spit their paci out 30 seconds after you leave the nursery.
  • You will become brand loyal when it comes to diapers.  Give me all of the Pampers!  We have yet to have a blow out in eight weeks.  I would trust those things to stop a boat from sinking.
  • Finally, I am doing better than I think I am.  I struggle to believe that in every moment of motherhood, but I eventually come back to that conclusion.  I absolutely adore my baby boy, despite when we struggle.  I am learning the true meaning of “Grace, not perfection.”

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Photography by the wonderful Emily Whited of Sharon Elizabeth Photography.  Hair by Kara Edwards at Parlor 39 .

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